"Just Kill Me Now..."

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship."

Have you experienced the prompting of His Holy Spirit to minister to someone you didn't know? Your first thought, "Ya know Lord, I have a better idea, you can send someone else that is gifted to minister, I would rather pray silently for them."
Has God asked you leave a familiar place and live in a new location? Your initial reaction, "But Lord, our kids are settled here. You surely don't want us to uproot them now, do You?"
Or has God asked you to forgive someone that deeply wounded the core of who you are and your response was OR still is, "I AM NOT! I'd rather go to my grave than let that person off the hook. To hear me say I forgive them, No, they don't deserve it! Just kill me now..."

When God revealed the truth of Romans 12:1 to me years ago I prayed, "Lord, I want to be a living sacrifice that is pleasing to You. I want my life to show devotion and worship to my Savior. With the help of Your Spirit living in me, I can do this!" I thought this 'living sacrifice' thing would be easy peasy. Wow, was I wrong! I found myself wanting to go back to the Old Testament times when the Children of God would sacrifice an unblemished lamb or offer a burnt offering and be done with it. That would be much easier than offering up MY life as a living sacrifice, especially when He asks me to do something I am not comfortable doing.

I just love how God uncovers the attitude of my heart! He led me to His truth in Psalm 51:16-17, David was broken over his sins and cried out, "You do not want a sacrifice, or I would give it; You are not pleased with a burnt offering. The sacrifice pleasing to the Lord is a broken spirit. God, You will not despise a broken and humble heart." King David had all the possessions in the world at his finger tips and the only thing he could offer God, was himself, humbled and broken.

In order for me to be a living sacrifice that is pleasing to God, I must be broken and humble of heart. Daily, I must admit my sins before the Lord. Daily I must cry out to my Father to remove any remnant of self and be filled with His Holy Spirit. Daily, I must put my desires aside and be reminded that He is the desire of my heart! And daily, I must be reminded that a living sacrifice has the choice to be prostrate before the One who is the Sacrifice or walk away from the alter...

Yep, at times it would appear to be much easier to walk off the alter than to offer my life as a living sacrifice. As His child, in the end, when I stand face-to-face before my Savior (Romans 14:12,"So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God) and explain to Him the times I chose to walk away...I will probably drop to my knees in remorse. To see the pain in His eyes, unbearable!  I believe He will then lift me to my feet and remind me that I am His because I chose to accept Him as my Savior while living on earth. He will then show me where my life was a living sacrifice, a sweet aroma or worship being offered up to heaven. Times I was aware of making the hard choice and even the times I had no clue.  The joy I will see on my Savior's face, is what my heart longs for!

Father God, I thank You for the truth of Your words. Help me to die to self daily, be filled with Your Holy Spirit, and truly let You have Your way in me no matter how much it hurts. May I be sensitive to Your prompting to minister to someone in need, to pray for my brothers and sisters in Christ, to forgive those who have hurt me, and to share the Good News to lost souls. Let me always remember the smile on Your sweet face far exceeds the smile on other people's faces. I want to be pleasing to You! Amen

How Beautiful The Feet of Our Savior!

As I sit here pondering the cross, thinking about what Jesus had to go through for all of mankind, I am drawn to the foot of the cross. His feet. His dirty, bloody, nail pierced feet that carried away our sins. Jesus chose the cross, He went in obedience to the Father but also because He knew that without His sacrifice, NOT ONE would be in heaven today! As in the Old Testament, we would still be going to a temple to sacrifice unblemished animals to atone for our sins. Can you imagine with the population of the world today, how much blood that would be? Just imagine Metro St. Louis, with an estimated population of over 300,000, what that would be like. Now imagine Delhi, India, with an estimated population of 16.75 Million! Are you getting a visual of how many unblemished animals, priest, towels, and water to clean up all the blood sacrificed to have a right relationship with God?

This is why I am in awe of His precious feet that carried away our sins...Jesus could have came in an instant as a grown man, went straight to the cross to die and then rose from the dead three days later. Boom, done! No secret betrayals, humiliation of carrying the cross, beatings, suffering, just a simple death that freed us all from sin. But instead; He came from Heaven, was born in a manger, learned to walk like us, talk like us, and experienced all the pains of childhood like us. As He grew older, He learned from his mother and His earthly father taught him the family business. He read and learned from the scriptures of old. I am sure He experienced teasing from other youth, and also the joys of growing up with strong family bonds.

When it was time for Jesus to begin His ministry; His feet carried Him on the dusty roads of Nazareth, near the shores of Galilee, to Bethany by way of the Jordan river which is where He stepped in to the waters to be baptized. He was then lead into the Judean wilderness for forty days. He walked throughout the regions of Galilee, Judea and Samaria. He walked up mountains to be alone with His Father. He stood on the raging sea. He taught in temples, in homes and on sea shores. People flocked to wherever His feet landed; those who believed He was the Messiah and those who would reject Him.

His feet lead Him to the outcasts; the crippled, blind, deaf, prostitutes, lepers, and demon possessed. He performed miracles in front of their eyes. He was lead to broken sinners wanting to be freed from the chains that bound them. His feet lead Him to the dead and He raised them to life. Oh, how beautiful His precious feet that were stained with dirt, tears and blood...

He entered Jerusalem where people threw palm branches at His feet. He wept for He knew that most would not believe in Him. His feet were washed with tears,dried with hair and anointed with oil. He was then lead to the Garden of Gethsemane where He cried out to His Father for His will to be done. He was betrayed with a kiss and lead away in shackles, beaten and mocked. He carried our humility and shame, our guilt and burdens. He carried our sins as He walked the long, dusty road to the place of Golgotha. 

Imagine with me the pain He endured. The blazing sun beat down upon Him and sweat began to stream down His shredded flesh! I am sure he wept, for He experienced excruciating pain. But the spiritual pain He endured was far worse than the physical pain. He was broken because He took on the stench of sin, the punishment of being separated from His Father. The Holy Son of God, who NOT ONCE sinned. The Unblemished Sacrifice became blemished, distorted for US!

How beautiful the feet of our Savior! He didn't stop and cry out, "Father take me home now. I give up!" Instead, He willingly laid down His life and cried out, "Father, forgive them they don't understand what they are doing." (Luke 23:34). And then cried out with His last breathe, "It is finished!"(John 19:30). Three days after His burial, He triumphantly walked out of the tomb ALIVE, defeating death and the power of darkness! He didn't stop there. He walked and talked with people to prove He was alive and that the grave could not keep Him, for He is GOD! Thousands witnessed His steps after the crucifixion!

As His beautiful, nail pierced feet stood on the mountain near Galilee, He spoke His final words to all of His followers before He ascended to heaven, "All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe everything I have commanded you. And remember, I am with you always to the end of the age."(Matthew 28:18-20).

We, His disciples, should walk as He walked. Are you following the footsteps of our Savior? Have you taken up your cross? He did say, "And whoever doesn't take up your cross and follow Me is not worthy of Me." (Matthew 10:38)

*Bible references found in HCSB throughout the four Gospels*

Am I Narrow Minded, Old-Fashioned and a Hater?

Because I fear the Lord, love Jesus, and believe the Bible to be the TRUTH; I am called narrow minded. Because I don't accept what the culture says is "acceptable", or follow what is "politically correct"; I am called old fashion. And just because I don't agree with another person's choice; I am considered a hater...

The other day someone said to me, "The bible is an outdated book of fairy-tales. It was good in 1950's but doesn't fit our day. I mean, I believe in God but He doesn't expect us to follow that 'old book'."

After a few moments, he  made a racial comment saying, "I'm SICK of blacks complaining about justice and within a few seconds he said with excitement, "Finally gay and lesbian have equal rights to get married!" WOW! Who is narrow minded?

The one calling me narrow minded, old-fashioned, and a hater because I don't agree with their lifestyle, and I believe the Word of God IS relevant for today, is the one that needs a fresh look in God's holy mirror. It breaks my heart when hate/prejudice against a person or group of people is justified for any reason.

God proved He loves ALL sinners but HATES sin when Jesus died on the cross. I may disappoint some of you reading this but I must say that a person's skin color is NOT A SIN! Jesus died for THE HUMAN RACE! Me marrying a black man and having bi-racial children, IS NOT A SIN! I will side with my God and say, "I love ALL sinners!" I am a sinner just like the rest of the human race. I chose to sin or not to sin. By the power of His Holy Spirit living in me, I can overcome sinful choices when I allow Him full control of my life by daily dying to self.

Hate/prejudice for ANY reason is SIN! Hate cannot reside in my heart because His Holy Spirit dwells in me and He is full of love. Hate and love cannot coexist! If you call yourself a Christian and have ANY hate for a person regardless of your reasoning, I plead with you to ask God for His heart. He is the only One who can change you and that change is from the inside out. 

Yes, I admit I am a Jesus freak, I'm in love with God, and I will not change my beliefs because "times have changed"! I will continue striving to please my Lord and Savior because He is worthy! God is STILL on the throne, His word is STILL true because He is TRUTH and HE doesn't change with the times!" I pray that people will stop believing the "god of lies" and turn to the God of TRUTH!

His Word is clear...
Matthew 24:35, "Heaven and earth will disappear, but my words will never disappear."
Hebrews 13:8, "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever".


Dear Lord, help us to not give into the ways of this world but to always stand firm in our belief in You and Your word. If there is any hate in our hearts for a person for any reason at all, please reveal it so that we can repent and love as You love! For You are the One we will stand before in the end. In Jesus' name I pray.

Love as Jesus Loved and Serve as Jesus Served

John 13:35 (HCSB) “By this all people will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Early one morning as I was praying about a situation, God spoke to my heart and had me read the story in John 13, when Jesus washed His disciples’ feet. I had studied this passage over the years and one truth that stuck out to me; Jesus washed ALL of their feet! Peter, Andrew, James, His beloved John, Phillip, Bartholomew, Thomas, Matthew, James the son of Alphaeus, Thaddaeus, Simon the Zealot and Judas the one to betray Him.

The truth that Jesus served His enemy, the one to betray Him, had such an impact in my personal life that I was compelled to share it with our Deaf ministry.

I asked for twelve volunteers and designated one to be Peter and another to be Judas. As their teacher, I put on an apron, grabbed a towel, pitcher of water and bowl and got on my knees and humbly washed their feet. I looked into each of their eyes with love and after I dried their feet I signed, “I love you”.

I explained that I imagine Jesus, who is full of love and compassion, looked into the eyes of each disciple showing them what LOVE looks like. I imagine when Jesus got to Judas, He tried looking into his eyes but Judas was full of selfish pride he could not look at Jesus. Jesus continued to serve Judas with the same love he shared with the others. After this Jesus said, in John 13:13,“Do you know what I have done for you? You call Me Teacher and Lord. This is well said, for I am. If I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example that you also should do just as I have done for you.”

When the Lord first revealed this truth to me, I was extremely upset and said, “Lord, I CAN’T serve the one who has betrayed me. It’s not fair. I can’t! I won’t! The hurt is beyond anything anyone should have to experience!” Then He spoke gently to my heart and said, “Daughter, I know you can’t but if you learn from Me, I will show you how and in time you will be able to truly love and forgive this person.” I had thought I forgave but when the Lord showed me this story in John, I realized true forgiveness is seen through my actions. I surrendered all my pain, my “right” to hold a grudge and asked my ABBA to help me forgive as He forgives. That day I was set free from bitterness and love filled my heart for the one who betrayed me.

I believe the Lord wants us all to learn from this story. It’s easy to love and serve those who love us. It’s easy to forgive those who seek our forgiveness but what about the one who doesn’t. What about the one who has hurt you and won’t admit their wrong. We must ask the Lord to give us His heart to forgive, love and serve them too,and by this the world will know we are His disciples.

Lord, heal my pain, my scars that are so deep and help me to forgive as You forgive,love as You love, and serve as You serve. The world is watching. May they see You through me. In Jesus name!

I AM FREE!!!!!

John 8:31-32 "Jesus said to the people who believed in him, “You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

John 8:36 "So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free."

Galatians 5:13 "For you have been called to live in freedom, my brothers and sisters. But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love."


I AM FREE! By the precious blood of Jesus, I am set FREE! I am no longer bound by sin, no longer bound to self! I am FREE to live for God because He set me FREE the day I gave my life to Him! How can I be so confident and KNOW I have been set FREE? The Bible tells me so! Jesus speaks about the freedom He gives. Read the passages of scripture once again. If you have been saved through faith in Jesus Christ, you too are set FREE!

Unfortunately, many Christians do not understand what it means to have freedom in Christ. Some are still bound by sin because, sadly, they are believing Satan lies over Jesus' truth. One reason is because they rely on others to tell them what God's word says instead of spending time reading His word for themselves. This leads to spiritual weakness and the end result is using our freedom in Christ to satisfy the sinful nature.

What sin has you held captive? What is IT that has you bound up to the point of exhaustion and you are no longer trying to get out from under its yoke? Seriously?! I am not talking about a moment of sinning, because we all fall from time to time. I am talking about the sinful behavior that the world says is alright if you do it. There may even be sin that no one else knows about except you and your Savior. Yes, He knows the addiction that continues to control your life and so does Satan. Satan keeps screaming in your mind,"(Your name here), come on you know you want to. You're already thinking about it so you might as well do it. No one is watching. Come on just one more time and tomorrow you will try again. After all didn't Jesus die for all sins, He will understand."

The TRUTH is, Jesus DID die for ALL SINS but He didn't die for us to stay in our sins and use His precious blood as a reason to keep on sinning! He was tortured, beaten beyond recognition, and mocked by onlookers as He died on the cross. Praise be to God, after three days in the grave, HE AROSE! He defeated death to set the captives free! This freedom cost us nothing but cost Him everything! He proclaimed to the world that day, "You are worth my blood being shed!" In return for my freedom I will proclaim to the world, "I was once a slave to sin, headed to hell, and now I am FREE in Christ!" It may cost me friends, family, popularity among the masses but all I can say, "HE IS WORTHY! I AM FREE!!!!"

How Do I Live Face-to-Face with Jesus?

Isaiah 41:10(NLT)"Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand."

Isaiah 41:13 "For I hold you by your right hand—I, the Lord your God. And I say to you,‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you." ***********************************************************************************
I just love how God speaks to my heart through His word. He led me to these verses when I was diagnosed with a brain tumor on May 20, 2012. I had brain surgery on May 24, to remove the benign tumor which was the size of an over-grown tangerine. It was a long 7 hour surgery and my surgeon removed it ALL! PTL!! Side note; 7 hours of surgery...the number 7 is the number of completion in the Bible :)

During my stay in the hospital, several of the staff would grab hold of my right hand with their right hand and look me in the eyes and talk tenderly to me. The first person to do this was my nurse,Faith, in the emergency room. After I received the news about the tumor, she grabbed my right hand with her right hand, looked me square in the eyes and said, "God told me to tell you, 'I will never leave you nor forsake you.'" Yes, I cried like a baby because my Lord spoke to me through my nurse! The next person was the young man who wheeled me up to my room. Once he got me settled in my bed, he grabbed my right hand with his right hand and said with all confidence, "God's got this!" Yep, you guessed it, I cried again!

I knew there was something significant about God's right hand so I began to look through the scriptures to find His truth. He lead me to Isaiah 41. Verses ten and thirteen stood out to me and as I read these precious words over and over again, God spoke clearly to my heart. Living face-to-face with Jesus is when His victorious right hand is holding on to my right hand and my eyes are fixed on His. Similar to Peter walking on the stormy sea. When his eyes were on Jesus, he was steady in his walk but as soon as he took his eyes off Him and started looking at the raging waves, he began to sink into the deep. (Matthew 14:22-31)

Life is like an ocean, calm and smooth and then out of no where a storm arises and the waves are crashing all around us. Some storms are predictable and others hit us when we least expect it. I would suspect those are the worst. But in our journey of life whether in a storm or all is well, we must keep our eyes fixed on Jesus. Hebrews 12:2 (NKJ), "...looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

May I encourage you to look to your Savior, He is there waiting for you to reach for His outstretched, nail scarred, victorious right hand with your right hand so that He can lead you through the storms and the joys of life. If you have never truly trusted Him as your Savior, what are you waiting for? Just call on His name, Jesus, believe in your heart that He died for YOUR sins, and God raised Him from the dead(Romans 10:9). If you do this He will reach for you and you, my friend, will have be saved. I am not promising that life will be easy after that but if you fix your gaze on Christ, He will walk with you and often times He will carry you.

Father God, help me to live face-to-face with Jesus, keeping my eyes fixed on Him during this journey of life. When I lose my focus, come to my rescue and as Your Holy Spirit quickens my heart, may I return my gaze to You. Father, You know the journey is hard and to some it seems there is no light at the end of their tunnel. I pray for those struggling right now that they will learn to live face-to-face with their Savior. No matter the journey we are on, we just need to hold on tight to your victorious right hand! In Jesus' name.

Let Your Actions Speak Louder than Your Words

1 John 3:18 "Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions."


We've all heard the saying; "You sure can talk the talk but can you walk the walk?" When I read the words of John in this passage, that statement immediately came to mind.

How often do I say I love my neighbor yet refuse to help them when in need, Christian or not? How often do I not show mercy and instead judge another's faults? How often do I withhold forgivness when someone sins against me? Or retaliate when someone hurts me? This one hit me square in the eye; How often do you pray for those who are lost as well as my brothers/sisters in Christ who are struggling?

Being a Follower of Christ means we follow His example. We are supposed to do as He did. Jesus prayed, forgave, showed mercy, helped, healed, was compassionate, and never condemned. He didn't just do this to those who followed Him closely. He did it with everyone He met! I am reminded that Jesus washed the disciples feet...ALL the disciples, including Judas, the one who betrayed Him(John 13).

He also did not retaliate when the religious rulers spat in His face or the Roman soldiers plucked out His beard, beat Him beyond recognition, then finally nailed Him to the cross to die a sinners death. Instead He cried out, Father, forgive them for they don't know what they are doing!" (Luke 23:34) He definitely "walked the walk" and showed love in action.

Lord, help me to have Christ's attitude. Help me to follow His ways and not the ways of this world or my own flesh. I know that by Your Holy Spirit living in me, I can do all things through Christ who gives me strengh. I love you Lord and want to show Your love to the world but I do NEED Your help! In Jesus' name I pray!